Friday, February 22, 2019

I Am Stupid



This is the next song in the continuing series of songs about a fucked up school. This one's about how the teachers make the students feel stupid.  (See below if you're unfamiliar with this project).

I was looking at all the blog entries in this series the other day and realized, whoops, it started out with the main character being a grown up woman, and then a little ways in, she regressed and turned into a little girl.  I was all, "ooooops," when I noticed that.

I made her grown up again in this song - see, the picture above is her as a grown up woman (yeah, I suck at drawing women); and the dude is her friend, that boy in the baseball cap in previous entries, but all growed up.

Yeah, that was weird that I made the character regress in this here blog. But, as I've been sayin' all along, the unconscious mind - which is where I'm gettin' lots of this material from - exists in all time periods, not just one. That's why a lot of these songs have stuff in them from both my grad-school days, and my little kid days. Cuz that old unconscious mind of mine is accessing all different time periods. Dood.

Here's last week's song if you turn it around backwards.

And here are the lyrics:
I’m as insignificant as a speck of dust on a mosquito’s butt

There she is again, we found her again

Her brain got twisted and got torqued
And now she thinks she is a dork
Who never does her work that well
And now she thinks she’s goin’ to Hell
We are the angels who are tryin’ to tell her that she’s fine
But she don’t hear us cuz the teachers got into her mind
She used to be able to communicate with us
But she lost that connection when she got on that bus
The only thing she knows now is stupidness and dread
And it makes her never want to get out of bed

We work hard, don’tcha know, but the teachers said we don’t

I am stupid

And we’re going to hell cuz we did not hear the bell
We were late to class and the teacher said…

We are stupid

One day, I started writing a song about a fucked up school. Then, a few days later, that lawsuit came out, involving those pervy professors in the Dartmouth Department of Psychological and Brain Sciences. I was all, oh, my stars!!! That's where I got my Ph.D.! Then I finished writing the song about a week later. I thought it was just a song about how the school system fucks up kids, but after I finished writing and recording it, I realized parts of it were about my experiences in that poopy psych department (the unconscious mind works in mysterious ways). In any event, I decided to write an album about a fucked up school in order to process my experiences of having been in that department and how the culture there impacted me. This album ain't necessarily about Dartmouth, per se. It's more of a weird, inner exploration where I'm, like, having a fucked up dialogue with my unconscious about my experiences at Dartmouth. Jung used to call that kind of stuff "active imagination." 

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