He Cleaned Out My Insides With Bleach

 

He Cleaned Out My Insides With Bleach

 This is a song about an abusive relationship I was in many years ago. (It was psychologically, but not physically abusive). This man was the master of mind-games, and I got gas-lit to the point where I felt as if I was a hollow empty shell, as if he'd cleaned out my insides with bleach. 

This song focuses on how the memories of being in that relationship are still vivid, years later. My gosh, it's as if it had just happened yesterday. 

The lyrics are:

I'm still there and I feel hollowed out, like he cleaned out my insides with bleach

This is the story of a bad boyfriend
And even though things have come to an end
Sometimes I feel like I am still with him
Being controlled by him, and it feels grim
Every time I opened my mouth, he would ignore me
Or else he would get mad at me and tell me forcefully
That I was the stupidest person he ever met
I feel like a loser, and now I have much regret

I'm still there and I feel hollowed out, like he cleaned out my insides with bleach

I'm living frozen moments in time
In the glare of his icy stare, I was aware
If I said something he thought was out of turn
Everything got so hot, his words would start to burn
The pendulum distortion of it fits and sits in the prettiness of the new dress
He was aware of what I was wearing

It was inside the icy stare of him

I'm still there and I feel hollowed out, like he cleaned out my insides with bleach

Funny how a traumatic memory stays with you
It feels like it happened just yesterday, I'm not through
Feeling like he cleaned out my insides with bleach
He was really mean, and I left cuz he's not a peach
I was in a battle for my very soul, I think
He made me sad and real soon, I would start to sink
deeper into Hell, with the scary controlling man
Down and down I fell, until one day, away, I ran

I'm still there and I feel hollowed out, like he cleaned out my insides with bleach

Here's the alternative player thingy, in case the one up top is incompatible with your portable electronic device: