I'll Miss The Me I Was When You Weren't Gone

I'll Miss The Me I Was When You Weren't Gone

 This is the next song in the possession album. The me-character anticipates what it's going to feel like when the fire god goes back up to the sun. She anticipates missing what she used to be like when he was here.

The lyrics are:

I'll miss the me I was when you weren't gone
I'll miss the me I was when you weren't gone

Ninety two point eight six four million
Miles away is where you will be

I'll miss the me I was when you weren't gone
I'll miss the me I was when you weren't gone

I don't know what to think about this
Sense of future separateness
Will you think of me when you're up there
In the sun above? I can't bear

To think of being long forgotten
By my sunny shiny, fiery friend

What if I am the moon, reflecting back the sun?
I guess I'll find out soon, and I'll miss you a ton
I hope you do not forget about me, my old friend
What if I come to regret the way this story ends?
What if I am the moon, and you're the fiery sun?
I'll be hidden in gloom, not seen by anyone
But you say that I have light inside my very soul
And by myself I'll be bright, a burning fiery coal

I'll miss the us we were when you weren't gone
I'll miss the us we were when you weren't gone

Here's the alternative player-thingy, in case it's more to your liking than the one above:

I'm Not Hungry Right Now

Here's a song about losing one's appetite. I didn't have much appetite on Tuesday, so I started writing this song. My internet is slower than death and keeps on crapping out...I'll put the player thingy I usually put at the top there in a couple days.

The lyrics are:

I'm not hungry right now; I'm not hungry right now

My brain malfunctioned; I don't know what to do
My brain malfunctioned; and it does not want stew

I'm not hungry right now; I'm not hungry right now

My brain malfunctioned, and I don't feel quite right
It's not a fun thing I don't want to take a bite

I don't want to eat a broccoli sandwich
I don't want to eat a meal that has canned fish
Or a peanut butter and jelly
Thing that I got from that corner deli
I feel like I already do miss them
Those hunger gods, I wish I could kiss them
My appetite has gone into hiding
I don't feel right, is it a bad tiding?

My stomach's lacking the proper attitude
It is not asking....me to bring it food

I'm not hungry right now; I'm not hungry right now

                               

 

Your Soul Has Lots Of Light In It

 This is the next song in the possession album. The me-character talks to the fire god and tells him she anticipates she won't shine so brightly as a soul when he goes back to the sun. That whatever makes her a bright shiny being is just reflected light from him, like the moon reflects the light of the sun. He sez, no, that ain't the case, that the me-character's soul has plenty of light in it. I'll make the lyrics that the me-character sings red, and the ones that the fire god sings and raps orange, so you can tell 'em apart, cuz it's a duet and all that.

The lyrics are:

I know that the time is a-comin' when you'll go back up to the sun, friend
And I'll miss you, oh, holy-moly; and I can't control these tears rollin'
Down my cheeks and oh, God, I['ll miss you, holy shit, I wish I could kiss you
And I'm scared of what I will be like, when you go back up to the sunlight

And I know my light will not shine as bright as it did when you were with me
And I know my light will get dim; I'm feeling so grim, as you plainly see

I wish I could go up there with you, but I know what Grandma says is true
I have to stay here with the humans, and it is what I have to do, friend

And I know my light will not shine as bright as it did when you were with me
And I know my light will get dim; I'm feeling so grim, as you plainly see

I'll tell you it, I'll yellow it; I can't to better; I can't do better
I'll tell you it, I'll bellow it; I can't do better; I can't do better

Your soul has lots of light in it your soul has lots of light in it;
Your soul has lots of light in it your soul has lots of light in it

You have light that shines bright inside you
And it is bright, with flames, yellow and blue
And don't forget the red and the violet
And the green, and I sure do like it
And the orange, with light from the heavens
And burgundy, the light won't be lessened
When I got back up to the heavens and

On the day you die, I'll see you, my best friend

When you go up to the sun, will you sing a song for me? You don't have to
Of course I will sing you a good one; and I'll broadcast it from that old sun

And he says my light will still shine, and I will be fine, when he goes away
And I know in Heaven above, he'll sing lots of love; I wish he could stay

Writer's Block

 

Writer's Block

This is a song about having writer's block. I have writer's block right now. It's a sucky state o' mind to be in, cuz I never when it'll end. It's like the beginning of an earthquake - you never know how long it's gonna last and how poopy-bad it's gonna get.

The lyrics are:

Where did the music go?

Once upon a time, I used to write real good music
A dream would bring me a tune and then I would use it
Those melodies flowed like beer, and I would drink to the
Muse who brought that music here, but now I say, “huh?”
The idea machine's getting all jammed up now
It's a bucket of bolts, and I do not know how
To make it work again, can I get some advice?
To get my stupid brain working again it would be nice

Where did the music go?

Writer's block has come about; the idea-well is all tapped out
I don't know why it has run dry; what the fuck? it make me want to cry
What the fuck is happening to me? Has bad luck made my music bleed?
But I guess it's on with the show; I confess, I just want to throw up
The idea machine's getting all rusted out
Maybe if it gets cleaned, it'll be fine, but I doubt
That this will go away any time soon, oh dear
My muse has flown away off to the moon, I fear

Where did the music go?
I'm lost, I'm sad, I'm bewildered, I'm bewildered

I do not know why the music-well has run dry
My brain is feeling quite fried, and I want to cry

What if it never comes back, never comes to me

I'll be a sad sack, in fact, if it stays poopy

You're my music-muse friend

Can you come back again?

If you come on back soon

We can sing a very merry tune

I'm lost, I'm sad, I'm bewildered

No, You Can't Be What The Ghosts Used To Be

No You Can't Be What The Ghosts Used To Be

 This is the next song in the possession album. The me-character used to think spirits and ghosts were all the same thing - like, they were both scary things, I guess you could say. But then, when she interfaces with the little baby spirit, the missing part of her own soul, she discovers that the baby isn't a ghost and isn't scary, either. Yup.

The lyrics are:

I used to think all spirits lived in the land of ghosts, but now
It is abundantly clear this baby don't hang with that ghost crowd

No, you can't be what the ghosts used to be

I cannot tell what part of me is me
Is my grown up self and what is the baby

No, you can't be what the ghosts used to be

I used to think that spirits were the same as ghosts
Now it's very clear that this baby is most
Definitely part of me and I am not scared
Now I feel lots of love for the baby I care
I knew the minute that the baby joined me
I heard her sing it – I heard her say boy these
Guys who are named Timmy and Bobby will be
My teddy bears – I know it sounds silly
I feel kind different and I dunno
How to feel but I know I should go with the flow
I'm a little tiny but sad today
Cuz I took the little baby away
From her bear friends, but I notice concurrently
It's apparent Timmy and Bobby are friends to me
And that will fill the void I know it will happen
We'll hang out with those boys and they will be glad friends

No, you can't be what the ghosts used to be

I Want To Smoke Some Pot With Willie Nelson

I Want To Smoke Some Pot With Willie Nelson

 This song is about how, if I had one final wish, it would be to smoke pot with Willie Nelson. I hear he smokes a lot of pot. 

See, I recorded a version of it last night, but it kinda sucks, so I re-did it today, and this one is better. I changed the key it was in, added more harmonies, did the chorus a little different, and re-wrote the first half of the rap. Yeah, this one's better. 

I'm gonna leave the old one up for posterity's sake, but you don't have to listen to it if you don't want to.

The lyrics are:

Before I die, let me just try
Oh, God above, give me some sweet love
It is a thing I want to do
Oh, God above, please let my wish come true

Before I die, I want to smoke some pot

With Willie Nelson: Can we smoke a lot?

Smoking some pot with the King of Country
Oh my God, that would be a fun treat
Smoking weed with Old Willie

Yes, indeed, I'll get stoned until I'm silly

Before I die, I want to smoke a joint
With Willie Nelson; I won't be disappointed

If my birthday wish did come true

I know what I would want to do

Maybe I should wish on a star

Or the wishing well by the country bar

If my wishes came true, here's what I'd do
I'd smoke with Willie, and we'd have some Blue
Dream and maybe we'd make up some music
On my Gibson SG and his acoustic

Before I die, I want to take a toke
With Willie Nelson, my favorite country bloke

Before I die, I want to smoke a bong
With Willie Nelson; I think we'd get along

I Want To Smoke With Willie Nelson

My internet is slow and poopy, so I'll put this little embedded player thingy here and do the other player thingy when my internet decides to not be slow and lame. I dunno if I'll get a chance to do other stuff to this post till a few days later cuz I'm getting my covid vaccine booster thingy tomorrow, so I'll probably be sick as a dog.

My Doctor Counts on the Left Side of the World

My Doctor Counts On The Left Side Of The World

The first part of this song came to me in a dream, so I decided to flesh it out and make it into a whole song - here it is!

The lyrics are:
My doctor counts on the left side of the world

Isn't that a trip?

I wonder why he is...in this dream narrative

My doctor counts on the left side of the world

Doctor what's his name showed...everything that he knows...about the

Left side of the world

I do not know what this song could mean
I got it from an early morning dream
It has a doctor who counts on the left
Side of the world, so we're not bereft
Of his amazing counting qualities
That mother fucker counts all that he sees
But only on the left side of this place
That's where he counts, with a smiling face

Here's the alternative player thingy, in case the one up top is incompatible with your portable electronic device:

StupidLand

 

StupidLand

 This is a song about nothing in particular. Or maybe, now that I think of it, it's a song about the state o' the world. Yeah, that sounds about right to me.

I'm Just a Little Baby

I'm Just a Little Baby

 This is the next song in the possession album. The little baby part of the me-character's soul considers going back to the me-character's body. The bears think it's a good idear, because Timmy and Bobby, her bestest friends, will be loyal, bear-like companions.

The lyrics are:

I am looking at those guys next to the larger part of me
And they seem like they are nice
Then I heard the bears' advice
They said Tim and Bob are bear-like, and I can depend on them
And they are my bestest friends
They're be with me till the end

I'm just a little baby who ran away in fear
But now it seems like maybe with friends who seem so dear
I can go back to myself
I can go back to myself

And the bears said they will miss me, but we'll meet up in the sky
On the day...that I die
We will meet up in the sky
And it's time to go back to the rest of me, and I'll be fine
And I'll go back to my mind
In the end, I will be fine

I am a baby, who has been living with bears
And they say, “hey, these dudes, that we see standing there
They might not look like us, with furry rounded ears, but
What they've got is a must: they are friends who'll dry your tears
They are like bears, and now you are well aware
That they do care, and they really want to share
In all your dreams, and life's multiplicities
They're on your team even when things are shitty”

I'm just a little baby who ran away in fear
But now it seems like maybe with friends who seem so dear
I can go back to myself
I can go back to myself

Here's the alternative player thingy, in case the one up top doesn't float your boat:

Everything Sucks Today

 

Everything Sucks Today

This is another song where the hook came from a dream. It's about having one of those days, where everything sucks. You know those days where everything that could possibly go wrong, goes wrong? That's what this song is about.

The lyrics are:

And the weekday stupidness is bumming
And I don't know how to make it nice

Everything sucks today

I don't even want to get the mail
Out of the stupid mailbox
I'm feeling like bread that is stale
With a side of sadness on the rocks

Everything sucks today

Have you ever woken up on the wrong side of the bed?
Feeling like you're all fucked up on the inside of your head?
Have you ever woken up and said I will stay right here?
Hide under the covers and get yourself another beer

Everything sucks and there's nothing that doesn't suck
Everything's fucked, and this day is stuck in the muck
Like a bad dream, it will never quite leave your head
This memory will be with you till you are dead
Everything sucks, and this day is a testament
To bad luck, now the thing that's hard as cement
Is the memory of stupidness of a day
Burned into your brain and it will never go away

It Is Time For You To Come Out Of That Stupid Bedroom

Bedroom

This is the 999th song about escaping from that old abusive relationship I used to be in. 

See, all of us are made of parts; some parts hold on to traumas. Part o' me still feels like she's in the bedroom of the yucky man, who used to be my bad boyfriend. This song is welcoming her back into the sunlight. C'mon, Little-Me; you can come back out.

The lyrics are:

It is time for you to come out of that bedroom
It is time for you to come to come out of it now
It is time for you to come out of that bedroom
And you know it will be a good thing, somehow

It is time for you to go out in the sunlight
Of a bright and shiny rainbow covered day
It is time for you to come out in the sunlight
And forget about the shit from yesterday

It is time to come out of that stupid bedroom
This song's all about escaping from the gloom
Of the bad man, who took all of your light away
Come on out and about into a sunny day
You don't have to be scared of him anymore
Because you got away, you walked out of that door
So it's time to come out of the stupid bedroom

You can sing, you can shout, you're free of Mister Doom

It is time for you to come out of that bedroom
It is time for you to get the fuck away
It is time for you to come out of that bedroom
And emerge into a bright and sunny day

Here's the alternative player thingy, in case the one up top is incompatible with your portable electronic device, laptop, or desktop computer:

Timmy and Bobby Reprise

 

Timmy and Bobby Reprise

 Here's a reprise of the song I recorded on August 7, 2020. It's the Timmy and Bobby theme - they're callin' the little baby part of the me-character's soul, trying to get her to come and re-integrate with the me-character. It's a soul-retrieval-themed song.

The lyrics are:

We will talk to that little baby
And tell her that we'll always be here
We're like teddy bears and just maybe
She won't mind that we drink lots of beer

Come on little tyke; you might just get psyched
When you come on home again
We are teddy bears; And we always care
And we are your bestest friends

We know that those bears have protected
You from things that might cause lots of harm
But the larger you has selected
Us to be her favorite lucky charms

Come on little tyke; you might just get psyched
When you come on home again
We are teddy bears; And we always care
And we are your bestest friends

It's a big responsibility
Do we have the...ability?
To communicate with the baby
We're like bears who do not have rabies
If you come back...you will soon find
You'll be with friends who are not unkind
And we'll listen to Willie Nelson
He has good stories that he tells in...music

If you come back, we'll introduce you
To our favorite country music songs
And we guarantee you'll get used to
Bein' here cuz we all get along

Come on little tyke; you might just get psyched
When you come on home again

We are teddy bears; And we always care
And we are your bestest friends